White and White Attorneys at Law
White & White Attorney

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How can you coparent over the holidays?

Some Tennessee parents mistakenly believe that the best idea is to allow the kids to choose who to spend the holiday with. If you give them the choice, it puts them in an awkward position. Children often want to make their parents happy. If they fear upsetting you, you may not receive an honest answer. Your children may not even know how to make that choice. Consult with your visitation schedule first. Next, talk to your ex before you make plans.

CoParently explains true co-parenting involves compromise and conversation. For instance, say that you want to spend a week-long holiday out of town with the children, but your ex-spouse had plans with your children for one of those days. Seek a compromise. Find out if your ex would spend a different holiday with the children. If not, find a way to make the holiday work for different days.

Carrying on old traditions can be painful for children. While holidays are about tradition, you may want to change up the old traditions and begin to create new traditions. If you and your spouse watched holiday movies with the children on Christmas Eve every year, your children may feel disloyal or upset carrying out traditions without the other parent. Instead, consider playing games on Christmas Eve or reading from a book. If you have the children on a holiday, provide them with a way to speak to the other parent. A simple phone call can help children feel closer to both parents.

None of the above is to be taken as legal advice. It is for educational purposes only.